I Love You

Last week Shannon and I were having a rough day.  Truthfully, it would be more accurate to say we were having a rough month.  It seemed as though neither of us could do anything right, especially me!  I was feeling extraordinarily glum about the entire situation when I headed to Dom's RE class to help out.

During religious ed, there is an older gentleman that guards the building from any strangers that may wander into the hall.  Joe typically sits there, reads, chats a bit, but mostly just sits there.  He sat a pew ahead of us my entire childhood, but I never visited with him aside from the occasional greeting. He always seemed a little ornery, truth be told.

While I was standing in the hall waiting for the 2nd grade class to arrive, Joe and I began chatting.  Turns out he married his wife in Beach, ND which is where Dad is from.  His wife passed away a few years ago and it was clear he is lonely.  At the very end of our conversation he grabbed my arm, looked me right in the eyes said, "I want you to listen very carefully to me, you need to remember this.  Every day, even when you can't stand your husband, even if you have to look at the wall and grit your teeth, tell your husband that you love him.  There will be a day when you will wish you could tell him and you won't be able to.  It's very important."

Now, this is not a new revelation, advice I haven't heard before, but the random, out-of-the-clear-blue-sky delivery sure was!  Our conversation went from eastern Montana and what and where all his kids were to a "love-your-husband-no-matter-how-you-feel" discussion.  And it wasn't even a discussion, it was an "if-you-are-wise-you-will-listen-and-implement" statement.  

It's just so contrary to what society tells us. Marriages are continually falling apart and I think one reason is that we are so used to pleasing ourselves.  Gone is the belief that suffering makes us stronger, holier.  Completely missing is an attitude of service of others.  The common belief seems to be that if we aren't ragingly happy (is ragingly a word?) something is amiss in our little world.  One thing I have learned is that happiness is fleeting.  And just because I'm not happy today doesn't mean that I won't be tomorrow.  And just because I'm not happy, doesn't mean that I need to make everyone else around me miserable, which is something I can tend towards!

Some days just aren't that great.  Or perfect.  Or blissful.  And often I'm not that great, or perfect, or blissful to be around!  But, I'll grit my teeth, tell Shannon I love him and keep moving forward.
We have too much vested in this crazy life of ours to go backward!   

As I related the story to Shannon, at first he was speechless, then the irony struck him and he laughed.  We both agreed that there couldn't have been a more unlikely angel.  God must really love me if he continually reaches through my stubbornness to speak to my heart!    
  

I love you, Shannon!